My life brings some interesting things. I am a work in progress… That used to be my prayer… Lord allow me to continue be a work in progress… I guess I say was but it is still I have not reached the point in my life where I could stop progressing. I think about this because I have been able to see the progression in my life between what is and what was. 

 Few months ago, I cut all communication with my ex but months earlier to that I ended the relationship. The reason I ended all communication with him was because I was moving on with my life and I didn’t see him as a part of my forward moment. So imagine my surprise when I get a message on Facebook from the ex that I excommunicated a few weeks ago. In all honestly I was caught off guard but I thought it was little comical that I received a message from him telling me that he was sorry he had gone so long without being in contact with me when I told him I no longer wished to have communication with him. In response I told him that I still did not want any contact with him. I decided to respond to the message because I thought that not responding to the message would subliminally imply that I was trying to avoid him. He responded to my message pleading for me to reconsider and not to hate him. I responded to him letting him know that I do not hate him but I am over it. 

 That is what has brought me to the blog today. How do you know when you are truly over someone? Some would argue that it is once you are met with that person or remnants of that person and you don’t feel anything. To that I would like to point out that feeling are typically fleeting. Some could argue it is once you don’t think about them any longer. To that I ask, if you are in love with someone but you have a busy life and you haven’t thought about them for a little time does that mean you are over them? How would I answer? I believe you are truly over someone when you don’t need to overly try to connect the dots. 

 How could have I overly tried to connect the dots? I could have told him that I had moved on and what my life is about now. I could have told him that I am happy in my life. I could have said that I am in love with someone who offers all the things that he couldn’t. I could have said that I have never felt this way in my life. My problem with all of this is that if ever someone needs to do all of this it’s because they feel some kind of way. There is a song by Latoya Luckett named Regret and in this song she is telling an ex that he must regret the day that he left her. She goes through all of things that he doesn’t have because he left her. Ludacris is featured on the song and he is telling Latoya all the things to tell her ex about how much better he is than her ex. When I first heard this song I was thinking about how much she must miss this dude. To go through all the trouble to say all the things he misses out on and then her “new dude” to go over state the obvious, well obvious if she had move on. 

 When I was a freshman in high school there was a girl who I had “beef” with, her name was Crystal. Now this “beef” stemmed over a guy apparently, well so I was told. All I knew was at some point I was talking to this guy on the basketball team and somewhere between us talking and him asking me out he got with Crystal. I was cool on him at that point. Well Crystal and I had a class together. She comes to me one day and tells me that she didn’t know that he was talking to me. None of that was a big deal. Okay he liked her more than me; I was a big girl about it. Over time Crystal began to get short with me. She was out of nowhere giving me advice to “get guys”. I guess because I wasn’t too receptive of her “advice” she took it as I was jealous of her and her two-minute relationship with the guy I was once talking to. Fast forward the story escalates to her telling her senior cousin to that cousin trying to talk to me to her cousin idol threats to her going on home study because she “felt threatened by me”. I was upset because in this whole “beef” I was never threatening toward her or anyone else she tried to have “step” to me…  I was most upset with the fact that through the school people would ask me why I disliked her so much over a guy. So they believed I ran her out of school because I was jealous. Now the thing is this story was false because if she actually felt she was in danger our school would have been if that were the case…. Well after that I had a hatred for her because she had portrayed me as someone I was not. Well about 3 years later I saw her in a store and I was not upset with her. I did not try to prove myself. I spoke to her and went about my day. I could have told her all the things that I wanted to tell her when I was younger person but it would not have mattered at that point. 

 All that said to say that moving on doesn’t have a timeframe but it does have signs. I know that when I am over something it not only cause me to act a certain way but I don’t think a certain way. I have grown up so much more than people may know. I am excited about the progress that God has allowed me to make. I am far from a finish product but I am all about my forward progress… We will move forward in 2010. 

 Alluringly taking in Tamia’s Can’t No Man while being a flirt. 

 -Imagoodgrl

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