Scene: Guy gets up to go to the restroom and tells the girl he’s dinning with “If my phone rings answer it.” Guy returns to find 2 missed calls. He asked the girl why she didn’t answer the phone she responds “I just didn’t feel comfortable answering your phone.”  Translation: “If I left my phone, I wouldn’t want  you answer my phone.” We tend to lead how we want others to follow.

Now anyone who knows me as of late knows that I, Keianna White, am an advocate of people staying in their lane. I have been doing a lot of thinking and I have come to the conclusion that everyone should and must stay in their own lane. What does it mean to say in your lane?

I guess that would as good a place to start if any… The best possibly. Staying in your lane means that you only perform tasks for your job title. Examples, if you are a passenger on the airplane don’t try to tell the pilot how to land the plan.  I feel that a lot of people don’t know how to stay in their lane… I watched a show named For the Love of RayJ , where every week women “compete” for one man’s affection. One girl was excited to go to the club and “dance with her boyfriend.” She was not staying in her lane. Clearly they are not in a relationship which could be defined as boyfriend/girlfriend because he has many women in this house for his pleasure. Now another example of  staying in one’s lane would be not offering input without it being solicited or if it does not directly relate to them.

Generally, staying in your lane is a good thing but there is a point when it goes too far. When you over analyze  and edit until you think it’s just best you skip that discussion or comment all together. I have realized that I fall in this  lately category. The reason I stay in my lane so immensely is because in most cases I don’t want to deal with confrontation. Though I know all confrontation is not bad but sometimes the thought of  confrontation makes me nervous, which is weird considering what I do for a job. I don’t know maybe that contributes to why I don’t offer my opinion when it is unwarranted.

For me staying in my lane to this extent causes me not express certain feelings and thoughts because it could cause me to appear a certain way. One of the biggest things to me is to not be needy. Not just not to appear needy but not to be needy. I think it’s an unattractive trait. Basically, I don’t want to be too much. What I have realized is that making this the first thought and all others secondary it can take away the genuineness of a moment or feeling. I also have a way of trying to over think something until I decide either I have figured it out, thus no need for a “head to head”, or allow time to past so my thought is fresh and others blind sided.

I do strongly believe in staying in ones lane, it can save one from getting their feelings hurt, however it can also cause one to push away people and things that they wish they were closer to. I am not saying anything other than I know that sometimes we may think that it benefit us to censor our emotions and feelings but it can be crippling too. Just think about it.

Inhaling Anthony Hamilton’s Point of it All while cherry red.

The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple. Oscar Wilde

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