What does it mean if you don’t have many friends? Does it mean that you’re a mean person? Does it mean that you don’t have anything to offer? Does it mean that you’re unapproachable? Does it mean you’re unreachable?

Could it mean that you don’t know what to look for in a friend? Could it mean you’re too complex? Or too simple? You want too much? Or too little?

From time to time I think about things I don’t have and day in and day out this is what is at the top of my list. I think about all of think of all of the people I know and have known and how they keep friends and hang out with those friends and how I don’t. I think who is at fault? I think about what are they doing? Or what am I not doing?  And if it is me, how do I break the cycle?

Sometimes I think maybe it’s not a big deal. Like maybe I’m just busy and everyone else is busy so it’s not that bad. But then I see people just as busy or busier than me hanging out with their friends and I’m at home. I know everyone’s schedules are different and most people don’t get up as early as I do but still does that mean I should be a recluse? I don’t need a lot of friends like Diddy but a Girlfriends/ Sex and the City size troupe would be good. Just a small crew is all I want. Ride or die friends, and of course not literal “ride or die” just through thick and thin friends.

As I am writing this, I am think about what my next course of action will be. I was always taught that in order have friends you need to show yourself friendly. And I feel like I do. No not generally, but I feel like to my friends I am a true friend.

I want to make it plain, I’m not writing this to make my current, yet geographically distant, friends feel bad or appeal for people to be my friend. Just doing what I do here, which express my thoughts for time to time.

Sometimes I’m a unique individual but I am who I am and that is all there is. Thankfully, there are some people in this world that love me and my particular brand of uniqueness even though it may not always be easy. So to those of you to which that applies… Thank You!

Consciously taking in Beyonce’s Woman Like me so Cut It Out.